travel tips: what makes a good travel buddy?

I have been super lucky to meet like-minded people who are willing to be my travel buddy.  Part of that had to do with working on a boat, but I’m also pretty outgoing and love to chat with people about travel.

Because I’m the only person from my high school and college friend groups that is peripatetic, I tend to travel alone. I do, however, like to pick up travel buddies from time to time – exploring a new city with someone else can be a great way to make memories and share some new experiences.

After having some pretty disastrous travel mishaps with friends, though, I have to question myself and my potential partner before agreeing to travel with them.

what makes a good travel buddy

James Michener once said, “if you reject the food, ignore the customs, fear the religion and avoid the people, you might better stay at home.”

While traveling, you are leaving behind the known for the unknown and forced to compromise your agenda with another person.

So what makes a good travel buddy? The girls in the photo above are former coworkers. We flew down to Cabo a few days early and hung out on the beach.

It was the easiest trip I’ve ever taken. We found the organic grocery shop, bought cheap champagne, and sat on the beach for hours watching the waves crash and the boys surf. We went out a few nights, but mostly we went no further than our front beach. Because we worked together, we already knew we got along well.

it takes two to tango

But what about when you barely know someone? When I was talking with Ryan – my yachtie – about his travel habits, I emailed him with various questions and it also came up naturally in conversations. I had told him about my prior mishaps and I was curious about what he wanted in a travel buddy. It does go both ways, you know.

ryan says…

“It sounds like we are totally on the same page, which is nice, because I’m sure you know its never fun to travel with someone who doesn’t share your sense of adventure or who has totally different ideas of what to do on any given day. A few questions regarding travel habits, while I’m talking about it: how long do you take to get ready? If we say we’re leaving at 9, and you get up at 8:30, will you be ready to go, or do you put us behind schedule? Haha… but seriously.  and are you keen to walk around, get lost, etc, or do you freak out? I’ve traveled with people like that, and I wanted to strangle them within thirty minutes. And do you walk fast? I can’t imagine you are opposed to walking places, as you work a fairly fit job, but some people would rather take cabs. I don’t, unless we’re going someplace ages away. I’m not a big bus person either (you’re like, sure, you’re on a bus right now, but I mean city buses.) I feel like walking gives you a better sense of a place. But let me know how you feel. Traveling with another person is of course all about compromise.”

decision making with your travel buddy

And… boom.  there it is. It’s all about compromise. That is a huge word but it’s so important when traveling. You have to be willing to let the other person take the lead now and then, or split up if you’re not feeling it. Ryan is an introvert, and one day the crowds were just too much for him. I ended up wandering around the entire afternoon alone while he went back to the flat and read. Let’s face it, most of us need some downtime or time to regroup, which can be hard when traveling and often leads to conflict.

Ryan and I were not friends. Let me make that very clear. We liked each other, and we had connected emotionally and physically, but I could never say he was a friend. However, he made an excellent travel buddy. We wanted to do the same things, see the same things – we also both like wine and have similar tastes in food, so dining out or eating in was never exhausting.

My conclusion? Friendship doesn’t always equal great travel buddy (and vice versa), but it can.

is it better to travel with an old friend

Having a travel buddy you have known for years can be hit or miss. I mentioned my friend Matt in a post about how not to travel – the one who I traveled across Europe with when we were 19. We are both stubborn, type A people.

While I thought Matt would be interested in the same things I was, it turned out I was wrong. We never communicated about our desires to see certain things – I took the lead but I never asked him what he wanted to do… on the flip side, while he let me take the lead in most things, he never told me what he wanted. It was a huge travel buddy fail on both our parts.

the people you meet along the way

So far I’ve only mentioned people I had a prior connection with. There are also the people you meet along the way.

In 2014, I happened upon two guys in Motueka, New Zealand who had met on a hiking trail and were in the process of securing an airplane ride in to the Heaphy Track trailhead. I ended up grabbing breakfast with them and I’m still in touch with Zac. In Queenstown, I met a girl who became a hiking buddy for a few hours, and I met an Aussie who became my wine-drinking companion.

Over the years, I have picked up the occasional travel buddy for a day trip, an overnight, or even a weekend getaway. It’s all about how you mesh.

In my experience, travel buddies are great. They’re a source of conversation on the long bus ride, someone to have dinner with, and someone who can take your photo. But, you’re subject to their whims and more often than not those whims turn into full blown arguments.

I have learned over the years that choosing a travel companion wisely can ensure your friendship remains intact and give you both fond memories to look back on.

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I’d love to hear your thoughts on travel buddies. Do you swear by them, or only travel with someone if you’re forced to? Or do you take the happy medium – travel solo but pick up a buddy along the way?

What sort of questions do you ask your potential travel buddy? Share any of your stories/horror stories in the comments below!

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